bullet in the brainpain SQUISH

okay i knew today would be bad as of the whole, i can't spend it with or even express how i feel to the person who i adore more than anything else... but it got so much fucking worse so very fucking quick

i stayed up all night writing this fucking essay for writing comp because mom talked me into not dropping the fucking class... so i get a half an hour nap before i go to school...

i go to school, first bad thing is that this one chick who i have been decently cool with lately was a complete uber-bitch and actually said shit which hurt... but that just annoyed me

then i found out pocky died... mom told me and she then said she did something stupid/silly and mentions how she and dad were looking at these cute puppies... which makes me excited as i have been wanting one.. but naturally they got a new hamster..... its prolly for the best... all my animals hate me

i then go to my next class... i turn in my fucking essay.... to find out i have missed so much class that i cannot pass.... so i am told to just drop...

i then hang out with taylor and bo for awhile and i then realize that i cant hang out with anyone there anymore as i will be leaving directly after abnormal psych from now on... so that means that there is even less chances for me to make friends... yeah..

i go home and pass out for another half of an hour... i get dressed... i throw on some flip flops and hope it wont be a big deal...

it is... so dad has to drop off my boots...

i sit outside the store with a bummed clove and sing Slip Out... i haven't sung that in a long time... it still lets me smile though... just like it always has...

i go to work... its work.. and i get though the whole two hours i am there... and its fine

i get another customer in, a family... and their ensuing purchase takes another hour... not that it was a bad thing oh no... i sold a ds, insurance on that, a pre order they didnt need, and some games... all for this one fucking kid who was sooo spoiled... and the father wouldnt even buy his eldest a shonen jump... i gave her a link to mangavolume... i felt good about that.. jill logged in quickly as the girl finds she has enough to buy her jump

i sell everything finally... i got commission on the insurance, my numbers will look awesome... totally worth the time it took...

i settle down to do my numbers...


and when i reach my final transaction i see that jill... is still logged in

so i get nothing... the sale is in her name and we can't do anything...

an hour fucking wasted....


this day was so fucking horrid that it was actually able to take my mind off of how utterly insane i am over losing carla... that is how fucking shitty today was...

i drew carli a tattoo flash....

i hope she likes it...

i hope she loves it..

i hope she will love me..